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Aren't homosexuals born
gay?
While no one consciously
chooses to have homosexual feelings, there is nothing that indicates they
are biologically determined to be forever homosexual. We will not arrogantly
say that biology has absolutely no bearing on a vulnerability to homosexuality. However,
even researchers agree that while there may be biological influences, they
do not obligate a person to be homosexual. Just because the stage is set
doesn't require the play to be acted out.
There are subtle
messages behind the thought of homosexuality being inborn. Many who hold
the belief that homosexuality is biologically determined assume it is therefore
both normal and moral. Let's suppose for a minute that homosexuality is
indeed determined by genetics or some other biological factor. Simply because
it is "natural" for the individual doesn't make it "normal." (Down's syndrome
is just one example of this).
It is not sound
logic to make the assumption that if someone were born gay then it is wrong
for religions to prohibit homosexual behavior. Most people will not argue
against religious admonitions against drunkenness or violence, yet modern
science has found genetic factors in these behaviors. Why would we want
to elevate this particular issue over others? Religions do not require
anything more from a person dealing with homosexuality then they do for
anyone else - becoming what we by nature are not.
What do you mean when
you say homosexuals can change?
A lot of damage has been done by Christians offering
a simplistic concept of change. Many give the admonition that homosexuality
is sin and that one just needs to stop it. This approach certainly lacks
understanding and probably lacks compassion as well. While behavior is
certainly one aspect of homosexuality, there are other facets of homosexuality
that can also be changed. To simply address the behavior is like looking
at the tip of the iceberg while ignoring the bulk of ice beneath the water
line.
Christ came that we may have life and have
it abundantly - not to live in the bondage of unwanted desires. We can
act upon those feelings or not and still be in bondage to them. When the
struggle to give in to these unwanted desires consumes much of our time
and energy every day, where is the freedom and abundant living?
This question leads to another often damaging
concept of change. The unrealistic promise of change to experiencing "normal"
heterosexual lust.
By change we believe that homosexually-oriented
people can:
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Change behavior --
that is, stop involvement in a homosexual lifestyle.
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Reduce, manage and
in some cases, practically eliminate homosexual feelings and attractions
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And in many cases
(though not all), experience satisfying heterosexual relationships.
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Why would a homosexual
even want to change?
Some people find their
same-gender attractions in conflict with their moral and religious
beliefs. Not willing to revise the traditional teachings about
homosexuality, they interpret their proclivities in light of the
scriptures. This has led some to the dreary decision to attempt to deny
and/or repress their desires. After years of isolation, shame and
rejection, the message of real change is a breath of life!
For others, homosexual
attractions have taken control of their life. The search for that one
person who will satisfy those deep inner longings never seems to end. For
some that pursuit has turned very sexual. That person becomes merely a
warm body who can ease the pain and longing for a night, or for a short while -
and yet those inner longings are still aching to be filled. Maybe the next
one will be the one ... and so the search goes on. For these, the message
of change brings the hope for an end to the cycle.
For others, their life has
been filled with a series of relationships, each starting with hope and
excitement. Each one, however, getting caught up in jealousy, emotional
dependency or unfaithfulness. The relationships end in heartbreak and
disillusionment. The message of lasting change offers true fulfillment in
relationships.
Yet others dealing with
same-gender attractions have considered the impact their pursuit of a gay
lifestyle would have on their loved ones. Finding the message of real
change gives hope for their marriages and family.
Won't saying homosexuals
can change promote homophobia?
No. As a matter of fact, just
the opposite. Dealing with homosexuality myself, I well understand the
injustice many homosexually-oriented people suffer. We at Reclamation work
hard to counter homophobic attitudes -- especially among religious groups, who
are perceived as the least tolerant toward homosexuals. A major part of our work
is education. We try to cultivate understanding, respect and compassion
for those who experience same-gendered attractions. We have been seeing
many hard and prejudiced attitudes change. We believe "loving
thy neighbor", and "treating others with dignity and respect" is
not a compromise of Christian values.
These days most people are
tripping all over themselves to avoid being perceived as 'discriminatory' or
'insensitive.' Yet many gay activists, dissatisfied with even this, have
broadened the definition of "homophobia' to include those who dare to
disagree with pro-gay perspective and philosophy (witness the turmoil with Dr.
Laura's upcoming series with Paramount). Either you're completely
pro-gay and therefore "enlightened and progressive", or they label you
a backward, "bigoted homophobe". This polarization is unfortunate and
untrue.
Most people -- even the
tolerant, accepting and liberal, still don't view homosexuality as the moral and
relational equivalent of heterosexuality -- and probably never will. But that
doesn't mean they therefore hate gays. It's not the "either-or"
situation gay activists suggest. Most people will not see homosexuals as a
legitimate racial minority, therefore entitled to complete minority rights.
Propaganda campaigns in media won't change this either.
A major issue when it comes to the Bible and
homosexuality is the importance and credibility we place on the Bible
itself. Many hold to the belief (as we do at Reclamation Resource Center)
that the Bible is the divinely inspired Word of God and as such is inerrant and
unchanging. There are others who see the Bible as merely written by men
and as such is not intended for today's culture or at least subject to human
experience and man's understanding of issues.
There are a few specific scriptures that refer to
homosexuality as sin that some modern theologians have tried to revise. An
honest reading of scriptures, however, leaves the person who is searching for
truth with the conclusion that the Bible does speak against homosexual behavior.
Those specific passages in both the Old and New Testament refer only
to the practice of homosexual behavior and not the vulnerability
to homosexual temptations. The Bible NEVER condemns anyone
for the temptations he or she deals with!
We won't go into detail on each specific passage
verse by verse here, but there are many sources on the web that do.
[Click
here for articles that do]. We feel it's just as important to look at
God's creational intent for our sexuality and the Bible's overall approach to any
behavior that falls outside His creational intent. We need to be very
careful that we don't "awfulize" the issue of homosexuality; but that
we see it in the same perspective the Bible does.
The starting point to look at God's creational
intent is, of course, Genesis. Some look at the Genesis
account of the
creation of Eve and say that God created Eve not Steve. But that paints a
picture of a distant, arbitrary God. In reality, God was closely involved
with Adam and understood Adam's need to be intimately connected with another to
fully realize his humanity. Not just any "other" would do,
however.
The only adequate counterpart was one who would be
similar enough to Adam to meet him on the basis of his humanity, yet unique
enough to draw him out of his aloneness and fill in the empty places of his
masculine soul. Another male would have been at core a mirror image of
Adam. It was when Adam first glanced at Eve that he began a journey of
self-discovery of his masculine soul. God created us as sexual beings, not
arbitrarily, but as an act of love.
And so God's intention for our sexuality cannot be
separated from our spirituality. We either relate to each other in
submission to His guidelines, or rebel from His design and live in relational
chaos. In the second chapter of Genesis we find God's design for human
sexuality: Sexual intimacy should only be expressed in the context of a
one man and one woman lifetime commitment (i.e., marriage).
Any sexual behavior outside of those parameters miss
God's intent for our sexuality and damage our souls and our relationship with
Him. We need to remember, then, that the Bible puts homosexual sex is in
the same category as pre-marital sex, extra-marital sex or any other sexual
behavior outside of the marriage bed of one man and one woman.
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